9 CAVITIES! You must understand how awful this is: Armageddon must be upon us! I have formerly been every dentist's sweetheart & poster child. Attending the U of I Dental college was a treat. You could flash to the other patients in Morse Code with the mobile overhead lights. I KNEW every flavor (and time duration) of every flouride treatment! (Never do the bubblegum or tangerine - they totally make you gag, but the tropical punch had a nice aftertaste . . .)
How embarrassing then, to go to my dental appointment today and have them pull up a screen and start identifying my cavities. "*ping* "Lower left, #5 . . .lower left #6, a kissing cavity - covering both sides. Lower left #9 . . ." *ping! ping!*"
I've been around dentists chairs enough to understand some of the lingo: emesial buckle, loose amalgum on the posterior, gingivitis extreemus on the lingual composite, I know what you're looking at! As my dentist looked, it was like discovering lottery numbers,
"#12 AND #13, *ping!* and an extra pinhole cavity on the anterior! *ping ping!*"
They gave me an "estimate" to fix my dental indiscressions. Almost $3,000. Because you'd want porcelain there up front so that no one could tell how badly you've fallen from grace. "That'll be extra, of course . . .your insurance doesn't cover that."
What a let down! How could this happen? I didn't get praise. I didn't get paraded around to other patients as proof that a soul CAN take care of their teeth. I got a flossing lesson and a new tooth brush to use, "with little circles, circling, circling . . ."
I KNOW HOW TO BRUSH MY TEETH, GOSH DARN IT! I'm the dentists SWEETHEART! I show OTHER patients how to brush! After feelings of self-pity and cold hard photographic evidence of my cavities, I have begun to feel like Ebenezer Scrooge; perhaps there is still time to change! Maybe we'll fix these little, cavities, and I'll be back in every dentists good graces again! Yes!
Then I think of the Final Judgment. I'll bet it's a lot like today's dental appointment. "Yah, I could tell I was slipping a little, but I didn't know that it was bad enough to get demoted to a lower kingdom . . ." Right now I'm salving my hurt feelings with Jell-O. I'm going to get better pretty quick. After I use this crutch to get over the trauma. I need more pudding.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Posted by Katrina at 11:03 AM