Wednesday, May 7, 2008

E mocht na-Kaiserschnitt hab'n


When my big brother, Joel, was on a mission to Austria, he went with his companion to an Austrian barber. His companion told him that if he wanted a crew cut "flat top", he needed to ask for a Kaiserschnitt. So he did. Loudly, and slowly, a couple of times over, so that the barber could understand. What was he really asking for? A C-section. Elders can be so cruel to greenies.

And I don't think that he wanted one any more than the one that I got. Besides having a totally cold room and wearing nuthin' but my gown, I told the anesthesiologist that drugs take awhile to take affect with me. Gosh darn it! He gave me the same "Yeah, yeah . . ." that I always get. And it took longer than he thought for the drugs to take affect. At first it felt like I was laying on top of sparklers. And then it hurt. "OW!"

I don't know what he gave me, but I gave in to it and was on a magical ride to I-don't-remember-where. I know I said stuff, but Matthew said that I was only mumbling stuff that was completely incoherent. I think I was saying, "I told you so, you freakin' idiot!"

To add insult to injury, I got a "spinal headache" which sounds innocuous enough, but due to spinal fluid leaking out of the aforementioned epidural, I got the most incredible headache of my life - lasting about a week. At first it was like a vice-grip on my upper head, and soon followed with the sensation that I'd been hit in the back of the head with a baseball bat. It's rare. I was told that it affects less than 4% of recipients. Lucky me!

So, if you've wondered where I am, it has been in a drug-induced coma sorta place. I am doing a little better, and trying to get everything under control. Slowly. I've been hab'n na Kaiserschnitt.

4 comments:

Meredith & Steve said...

It was SO GOOD to talk to you today - I am so sorry you have had such a rough time but today you really sounded like you were back to your old self again. He is darling - you are so lucky! The missionary story was fantastic! That is so funny...

Dickson Circus said...

LUCKY YOU! Now I'm going to take you to Vegas if you score in the 4% range where most people don't.
I'm sorry you aren't feeling well, though. The headaches are SCARY. However, your little guy is the cutest thing! Can't wait to meet him!

Joel said...

Speaking on behalf of all men, I'd just like to say that we are totally bummed that God has picked US not to go through pregnancy the way you gals do. You are SOOOO lucky! I'd trade places with all of you in an instant but I've got a Tee time a the Country Club in about 5, so yeah, I'm going to have to miss that. Toodles!

Matthew said...

Joel, you are SUCH a brat. If only that barber had given you what you asked for, when you asked for it!